August 7, 2013, a square block on the calendar with a number in it looking just like every other day. However, this could not be further from the truth as I see it, for it is the day that Haylee, my first precious grandchild, began Pre-K school.
She came marching in the house that morning proudly carrying her backpack, ready to embrace the day. Her mommy, Ashley (my baby) had her dressed like a little doll and she quickly snapped a picture of Haylee to share with others this “first day of school”.
Ashley rushed out to go to work leaving me with all the words I wanted to say stuck on my tongue. I knew she would be in a hurry as she is carpooling, having to fight the traffic and be on time, and is accountable to other people so I completely understood intellectually that there was no time for deep exchanges of emotions. Sometimes, though, my heart is not so cerebral.
I wanted to tell her how proud I was of her and what a great mother she is and try to articulate the elusive concept of double-love. What is double-love you ask? That is when you love your grandchild because of the little person that they are with their own special place in your heart - combined with loving your grandchild through the prism of the love that you feel for your own child as well!
Mentally stepping onto the step known as common sense, I realized that some things must be experienced to be understood and turned my mind to enjoy this most excellent day. Haylee chattered about how excited she was and how grand blueberries were and again the “I’m going to school today.”
She chattered as we were getting into the car, she prattled as we traveled down the highway, she worried that because it was “froggy” the school was going to be closed, she squealed with delight as we pulled up to the fast-track-drop-off. Then, just like that, she was whisked away with me turning in all kinds of juxtapositions to catch a fleeting glimpse as the teachers ushered her inside the building and rushed the cars quickly back out to the highway.
I did see her one last time as I pulled away, standing fourth in line, walking into the school. And as I smiled looking at her back and seeing the Lalaloopsy backpack, I saw as clearly as I saw Haylee that day, another little girl, my child ,on her first day of kindergarten, walking bravely into Child’s World and me watching every step until she was inside when suddenly, she turned around, blew me a kiss, and gave me an air hug.
A huge sunburst of double-love hit me and those words that had been stuck on my tongue earlier that day suddenly went from my heart past my tongue and became completely water-soluble as they turned into tears as this day and “yesterday” collided creating a flood of joy.
Worship - comes in all forms!
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